Dorothy, 74

Having started life as a very shy and self-conscious girl, Dorothy has gone on to become a vocal and prominent member of the community. In her time, she has fought to break down many a social stereotype, and just because she is 74 doesn’t mean she can’t break down yet another social stereotype: old age!

So, to celebrate her 75^th year in this world, the mother of four and grandmother of ? has gone and got herself a tattoo! A Celtic tree symbol on her wrist, to honour her Scottish heritage.

“My grandchildren think it’s really cool!”

But more than just a funky grandma, Dorothy is living proof that old age isn’t all doom and gloom.

“I think you can choose to start dying before you die,” says Dorothy. “Some people retire and then everything stops. To me, that would be a form of dying. I think to be alive is to be engaged with life, be it politics, movements or whatever. To try and change things still, I’ll be doing that till the day I die.”

And change things she has certainly tried to do. As a younger woman, Dorothy expelled her energies, not only in raising her four children, but immersing herself in countless radical movements.

“I think I lived in a period where there were a lot of movements for change. In my middle years there were all these Ban the Bomb, Anti-Vietnam War, Anti-Apartheid and Women’s Movements. I just got involved.”

However, with the benefit of hindsight, Dorothy sees that her deep involvement in such causes was also a way of ignoring issues about herself and her own sexuality.

“I think I decided very early on that marriage didn’t feel right, but, I was married for 34 years. That was largely due to me immersing myself in other things, such as the movements, the church and caring for my children.

“I am not sorry for that, but now I know I was sometimes using those activities to stop me facing who I was and entering my inner life. I needed to own and share my vulnerability and deal with my tendency to boost my own ego.”

It was not until her forties, a time when society tends to hand out used-by dates to women, that Dorothy started to embrace who she really was and became a prominent figure in the community.

“I learned a lot! I found my true vocation in ordained ministry. I then faced my sexuality. I felt an enormous sense of relief, that at last I could be true to myself. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But I never ever regretted it, not for one second, even though I was full of grief for hurting the people I loved.”

One benefit of age, says Dorothy, is the focus it has given her. “As you get older you have a different perspective on things. You can see your life is not endless, and you want to choose more carefully how you spend your time and energy. You decide what the most important things are for you.”

So in 1997, when Dorothy “outed” herself at the Uniting Church’s Perth Assembly, she decided to retire instead of staying to fight. “I had to choose between fighting endlessly for my position or leave and do something more creative. I was so close to retirement and also wanted to spend more time with Ali, my beloved partner, so I retired.”

It was then that Dorothy found her way to the South Sydney Uniting Church and The South Sydney Herald.

“I believe that my writing and my creativity keeps me alive, along with my commitment to The South Sydney Herald and its building of community.”

As Dorothy sees it, getting older isn’t a burden or a bore but more of a revelation.

“In fact, in my 75^th year, I am far more aware of my humanness than I was in my earlier life. I laugh at myself too.”

“I don’t mind that I won’t and can’t always see the results of the things I try to achieve. I am just one unique speck in eternal human existence and I do my little bit, that others may carry on.”

Photo: Ali Blogg : The famous tattoo